Mission Summary
The final SCUL mission of 2024 was rated as a success as closure was reached and the mission objectives were achieved:
- The mission was flown with all pilots returning to the hangar intact.
- A party was had with many a crock pot.
- Awards, gifts, poems, love, and reflection were abundant.
Mission in Detail
Lordmcfuzz led the mission.
Before departure, Pilot Truckstop christened the new Frigate Clamity using clam sauce. The ship construction incorporates two spawn civ ships into an excitingly colorful concoction. DrClaw and Patent Pending are credited with aiding in Clamity's construction.
Fearless navigator Cosima led the battalion as it departed Fort Antwarp at 1750 with 17 pilots on 16 ships (Diva joined Threespeed as the bombadier on PDP Strangelove). Skunk was on-site to provide high fives. Early into the mission, Pilot Treekiller added the power of the Battleship Lorax, upping the pilot total to 18.
There was no rest for these few who braved the increasingly cold space for this final mission, aside from two brief stops for mechanicals, which were quickly recovered. The newly-christened Frigate Clamity's propulsion transfer conduit became artificially shortened, necessitating field repairs. Later, PDP Strangelove dropped out of warp, but the problem was quickly corrected, and the mission resumed.
After entering the Boston system, our ambassador/pinner Truck Stop performed admirably at providing swag to civ transports, which were waiting to ransit a pulsar. Portions of the battalion frequently entered orbit around the planets in the Boston System. The entire battalion then orbited a particularly dark planet, with organic space junk and space dust interfering with transit along the route.
The battalion then crossed the Charles Asteroid Belt twice. This afforded an intermediate pass through the Central Constellation of the Cambridge System. Partway through the second crossing, an area denial beacon began transmitting at a pulsar we encountered at the harrowing Memorial Starpath. Rather than brave the impossible odds of transiting this pulsar—known recently as a bane of pilots everywhere—the battalion split in two. However, this was quickly rectified once the beacon ceased its transmission.
The battalion entered formation near the fort for a final tally. Cadet Pilot Spud was cheered by the battalion and hugged by Lordmcfuzz, and his spawn became known forevermore as the tater tots.
Then, upon returning to the hanger, much was yet to be done. A plethora of crock pots had invaded the fort. Red Squirrel monitored the situation in the battalion's absence, ensuring that the returning pilots could effectively rectify this situation. Additional specialty rations were made available to the pilots while the cleansing occurred.
The mission culminated with a delightful ceremony honoring pilots for the number of missions they flew on, the light years they traversed, and many other heartwarming exchanges were had. As Skunk has been retired to the status of Fleet Admiral Emeritus (and strongly encouraged to remain emeritus for administrative matters), Lordmcfuzz took the reins as the master of ceremonies.
Acehole gifted the pilots in attendance with custom SCUL escape keys for their keyboards, and Goose gave SCUL a massive bag of latex gloves. Many other individual and honorable gifts were given and several crushes were engaged.
Many awards were distributed:
- The Stone Cog to Truck Stop, Tango, and Moonbeam;
- The Bronze Cog to Patent Pending, Meownderthal, and Kilo3; and
- An illuminated Iron Cog Award to Acehole!
Unfortunately, we must say adieu to two of our pilots. Leotard is retiring—we wish her well! We hope that eXceSs, who is leaving for a distant galaxy, will carry the SCUL torch onward to new frontiers.
Several of our other friends were encountered along the way:
- Hyde... or was that Jeckyll giving us high fives in her lab coat?
- Vomit
- Kilo3, out on medical leave
- Ishkabibble
At the culmination of ceremonies, Skunk led a sortie to the surrounds of the fort to demonstrate his modded Honda Fit transport vehicle.
Ode to the Iron Cogs—2024 edition
Read by Lordmcfuzz
In '96 Skunk started a gang
in order to have some people to hang
It has been some 29 seasons
And only he has his reasons
Saturday night after Saturday night
Under him we took flight
Sometimes the very definition of Life Support
We will always remember Death before discomfort
The gang will forever bust the funk
It is my honor to award the title of Fleet Admiral Emeritus to Skunk
then Crack came along and believed in Skunk
she actually showed up and rode all that junk
NoWay rode with unstoppable vigor
which made our numbers 50% bigger
WalTor earned it for Y2K no doubt
He lives and dies by Skunk's command: until it's time to take him out
In 2001 the honor was Vomit's
She made a home for the fort -- well above and beyond it.
It happened to Diva in 2002
Living litmus test for the chopper groove
The same year, MegaSeth earned his pips
the beauty of his code rivaled only by his ships
In 2003 we gave it to Moose
A pilot and a friend who helps us deduce
Moose was happy to share his year with Rotwang
An easy rider and a boon to the gang.
Nameless builds ships as tough as a hog
2004 was his year for the cog.
ThreeSpeed saves the mission with excellent grace,
We made up new medals to keep up with his pace
Hapto shows us the meaning of Chic,
Tiara! Tiara! Flight-paths unfit for the weak.
Ehawk's award night we'll never forget
Though I suspect her hangover's one she regrets.
Nosepicker got it by traveling through time.
Shut up! (nosepicker nosepicker nosepicker)
Leotard's the one who lets the admiral know
It's time to ride: the crew wants to go
How can you begin to measure Hack's worth
Revolutionary master of organized work.
Yt is awesome at keeping the books
Jedi-level hooping with the stylishest of looks
No one more stalwart than our friend Treekiller
Always a hugger and never a quitter
A tiger run over by a horse has his mane underhoof,
Oh and by the way -- 2013's iron cog belongs to: Baaaaaaaaaaane Thunderwolf
Computio audio photeo geek -
demoscener Dr.Claw does it all for his friends in the fleet.
Skin tight spandex of incredible dayglow,
Civitron is the very essence of hero.
Excess never stops, he's an unstoppable force,
The right attitude and strong as a horse.
One thing that can be said 'bout Dead Bride,
The harder the mission, the better the ride.
A ball of pure energy - a full-on fun mission leader,
None take on Pastry Queen 'cause none could defeat them.
The point of McFuzz is to always do better,
His bunny tail acts as the gang's pace setter.
Seeing the bright side, no matter how dark it gets,
Red Squirrel's prepared for whatever – you bet!
Wombat's help with web coding has been so great
His value for SCUL isn't up for debate
Twoty twoty two we honored SCUL's juggernaughty diplomat
Local intel expert and all-rounded good guy Ziqquat.
A passion for adventure and a fantastic mission leadah
20-23 could be none other pilot than Cosima!
Officer of the deck, undaunted by headsets most crunchy
20-23 also ironed out our oddest fellow, Punchy
All these pilots we'll always remember
We never give up - never surrender!
As this poem grows longer and longer
The stamina of Life Day pilots must get incrementally stronger.
So of all you superstars of the '24 crew
Listen up cause I'm talking at you!
I take my stand here in front of you for my first time
Trying to come up with the correct rhyme
This ode is full of wonder and emotion
hoping you catch each notion
Skunk always made this look so easy
I hope I don't come across as cheesy
CSS, RGB, Titanium chopper
To not give this pilot iron would be improper
Master of orange, of armor, and of the 3d
Other pilots look on his lights with envy
Pinnacle of the cone, ready to roll
This year's Iron cog belongs to Acehole