Status: Failure


Starship Mumtacular

Star Date 140607 SCUL launches to project MUM. Deck Officer Fleet Admiral Skunk handed out positions for the evening's code-worded promenade. Treekiller accepted the duty of navigation. Although time ran out and Intercomonomicron decompressed the fort, ejecting all of us into space before we were prepared, we managed to get a hold of our ships and cruise to the launch pad. It was smooth anonymous sailing to the Central constellation.

As the fleet arrived at the undisclosed secret undisclosed location of secrecy we saw many people whom we referred to by their call signs, and not their civilian names. Thalo appeared first, as we anchored our ships, and soon Bucky came through the crowd of anonymous people moving in what I can only call ritualistic motions that I'm not free to disclose. Saphron could have been spotted as well as Ishkabible, Socket, and a belated Tyrian. There were many interesting works of glowy spinny art that I'm not at liberty to discuss. YT was totally not there, and I would never claim she was, and she certainly didn't make maggot Axlotol feel at home, and answer all his questions about the events that may or may not have been going on around us all. There were no multi colored brightly lit hoops being swung, nor DJs creating electronic tunes for the enhancement of ritualistic rhythmic movement. Not officially.

Mysteriously our original launching number increased by two upon leaving what i can only refer to here as Project Mum. Treekiller deferred to Doctor Claw who went mad with power as he sped us, full throttle towards the Reflecting pool hide-out of a strange and powerful order which inhabits a planet in the back bay system. Our sonic disruptors were having some problems, luckily for us, as the Mad Doctor was not able to send a message to the order's leaders. Rumor was he had planned to sell some of us into their service to pay off some previous debts he had accrued in his Claw-y dark and secret past. Leotard stopped to help Wombat try to repair Cloudbuster's sonic disruptors to soothe the enraged soul of Dr. Claw. Soon, the music distracted him from his dark quest, but his madness remained un-quelled. He led the fleet straight into the Boylston asteroid field, and despite our cries, was merciless in his demands, testing our mettle to the fullest. Tiring of our piteous whining, he turned off towards the Common where we enjoyed a cool respite in the planet's low-traffic air space and lush foliage. The rough-riding did take its toll, though, and we lost a maggot. Marrow bravely came forth, despite the terrifying insanity in Doctor Claw's Eyes, to ask for honorable discharge from the mission.

After a brief flight around downtown crossing and the financial district, the fleet rode back through the Common, heading for home. Upon crossing the hyperspace by-way, back into the Cambridge system, we landed at the Martian Institute of Threespeed-ology to drop fuel, and lost another pilot. Leotard had a plan. Luring the Mad Doctor into a facility of the campus, she harnessed the power of the Martian's technology, reversing the polarities on his deranged mind. Doctor Claw emerged, back to his usual self, as if the entire incident had never occurred. Taking command, Leotard could see that the crew still had a good deal of pep left in them. Smiling at the fleet, she gave a motivating speech, and the fleet responded "QAPLA'!", or would have, were they Klingons. We were not ready to return to the fort, and we would ride on! However, the crew requested sustenance and a stop was made at a refueling station, where there was some highly interesting conversation spurred by Acehole about what is NOT ART, and human anatomy. A large transport soon passed, and a screaming Princess Pecan frantically waved for us to rescue her from its clutches! Though many of us were able to touch her outstretched hand, none of us were fast and strong enough to dislodge her from the transport without the risk of seriously injuring her. Soon the transport disappeared into the vastness of space.

We rode on to a planet made for very small people to torture themselves in various ways for being terrible. Tyrian found a wide sloped disc that rotated, and Snow spun him around. He got off and sprocket jumped on, and was soon being spun upsidedown over and over. A few more pilots piled on, and the grip became difficult. The other pilots abandoned the disc, one quoted "seriously Sprocket how are you not throwing up yet?" and after a few more turns, Sprocket lost her grip and went tumbling off the disc. This planet had a sprinkler system, as many similar planets do, but no one could figure out how to make it work, even removing the electronic innards of the switch that turned the system on didn't help. Soon there was more excitement as XXIII began to climb a flag pole. Afterwards there was much chatting, and Axlotol revealed that he kept conflating Tyrian and XXIII.

As we continued through the Inman constellation, a civilian-fan shouted "Woo SCUL! Two wheels are better than four!" We flew through tunnels and down near Fort Joy, Bucky's blue LED gloves entertained us. Many secret signals were shared. And everyone lived in the glow of Dr. Claw's newfound englihtenment in recovering from the dark touch of the ring of power, and I'm not at liberty to go into the details! From there, we sailed home to the launch pad where the mission was pronounced a failure, as we'd lost two pilots. Axlotol was MERCILESSLY HAZED for the neatness of his beard (honestly, who has a neatly trimmed beard?) and there was subsequent to-do back at the fort.

All in all a great show of the perseverance of the pilot spirit, and how all you need is Martian Technology.

Visited Starship M.U.M.
Treekiller navigates the first leg, Dr.Claw takes over after
Picked up Buckminister and Tyrian before departing
Heavy transport traffic encountered in downtown Boston
Several pilots burned up in the Common
Quick loop through Downtown Crossing before heading back to Cambridge
Greeted by the crazy drunk guy hanging out in the self-storage building lot
Flyby of Fort Joy
Curious spinning disk in the Gold Star Mothers Park
XXIII scales a flagpole
Sprocket introduces babymaggot Axolotl

Pilot Ship Points Promotion
AceHole Temerity 385.187   Petty Officer Third Class
Axolotl War 0  
Buckminister Immaculate Taco 239.328   Aviator
DrClaw Shockwave 1383.12   Rear Admiral, Lower Half
Leotard Trinity 629.736   Master Chief Petty Officer
Marrow Doctor Love 0  
Sidekick Sloth 86.3966   Petty Officer Second Class
Snow Ez Raider 0  
Sprocket Mad Rabbit 315.043   Petty Officer Third Class
Treekiller lorax 262.037   Petty Officer Third Class
Tyrian Iridium 169.664  
Wombat Cloudbuster 387.211   Senior Chief Petty Officer
XXIII ReFLEX 460.411   Petty Officer First Class
Pilots must be logged in to see the briefing.
Taskforce Pilot
Mission Leader Treekiller
Deck Officer Skunk
Gate Attendant XXIII
MRC Officer Skunk
Navigator DrClaw
Tailgunner Leotard
Com-Sat 1 Snow
Tool Bag Treekiller
Flat Bag Snow
Medi Bag Leotard
Wookiee Bag AceHole
Ambassador XXIII
Chalk Bag XXIII
Still Cam AceHole
Airlock Leotard
Recycler danimal
Life Support 1 DrClaw
Damage Control DrClaw
Minister of Zoobs DrClaw
Mission Reporter Sprocket
Compressor Wrangler Skunk
Food Wrangler Skunk
Paper Wrangler Skunk
Print Jockey Skunk

Mission Parameters

Mission LeaderTreekiller
Mission Size 13 pilots
OriginFort Tyler
DestinationMaxiMUM Funkitude
Light Years17.993
G-Well Activity1.413
Technical Rating2.638