Status: Success


Oh Dam, A Dam

Mission Objectives

  • Appreciate the views of nebulas
  • Visit 3 dams (historical dams count)
  • Fly no more than 15 lightyears
  • Derby

Mission Summary

Madam, I'm a dam.

Kilo3 was back at it again with the eccentric mission themes. This time, we embarked on a tour of nebular containment structures of today and yesteryear. Bomber Pilot Pastry Queen was recruited as the last-minute navigator, and took the battalion on a scenic route along the Charles Asteroid Belt down to the Esplanade and beyond, without too much meandering to keep us within the bounds of our 15 light-year maximum. We were packed to the gills with maggots this mission, including new babymaggots happenstance and Tater Tot.

With auspicious winds blowing at the launch pad, pilots received an invigorating taste of space dust to start the mission before life support even came online - some battalions are just lucky, I guess! As we began our critical assessment of all this dam infrastructure, pilots quickly encountered delicious-looking, but commonly-aggressive feathered androids while in orbit along the Charles Asteroid Belt. Fortunately, without physical or auditory incident. (It's reported, however, that one among our ranks may have transmitted signal to these frightful, flightful interlopers! HONK, indeed.)

Further risking life and inner plasma casing for the sake of our mission, Pastry Queen bravely and safely navigated the battalion through heavy turbulence, which was most likely thrown off from transport vessels along Storrow. Adeptly handling navigation without computer display mounts and guiding a babymaggot bombardier, PQ truly shone as the "Storrow" the flight.

Along the Esplanade, the battalion spotted a training and refueling opportunity and stopped for derby and tardis, consuming SNAX and also salty lemonade (but only after washing their hands, thank you very much). With superior maneuvering, Lordmcfuzz flew away with a Derby Win before the battalion regrouped.

Fully-refueled and stopped only by pulsars, our fearless battalion boldly went where civilians and pilots were probably allowed to go(?) to complete a quick review of the "Charles River Dam" via wormhole transit. Pilots were pulled temporarily into well-known (but nearly unavoidable) black holes at both North Point Park and Cambridge Crossing... but the whole battalion seemed to be enjoying themselves and the clear, moonlit skies above them the entire time!

It should be noted that pilots skillfully avoided flying salad while traveling via wormhole on the return flight. Remember: not once, not ever! Just say no to greens, flying or otherwise... Well, actually, I take that back - do whatever you want. I'm not your dam parent.

Our Dam Status Report:
- Boston & Roxbury Mill Dam (now Beacon St through Back Bay): Reported hydro-halting structure is no longer evident, as hydro has been permanently halted. We can remove the Boston & Roxbury Mill Dam from the rolls for future inspections.
- Charles River Dam Bridge: Still present, but not serving as a primary dam. Recommend updating to low-priority status.
- Mill Pond Dam (now Causeway St): Historical dam now is a wormhole down the center of large space lanes.
- Charles River Dam: A dynamic hydro halting structure that allows fine control of the passage of nebula, still in active status. Variably functional as a wormhole.
Pilot Ship Points Promotion
couscous Bieber Fever 750.948   Aviator First Class
happenstance Scollay Rancher (Bombardier) 0  
Kilo3 Swamp Thing 1026.07   Petty Officer Third Class
Lordmcfuzz Albatross 714.213   Petty Officer First Class
Meownderthal Cat Peech 887.71   Petty Officer Second Class
Pastry Queen Scollay Rancher 741.657   Petty Officer Third Class
Patent Pending Life Alert 186.172   Aviator
Snow Ez Raider 58.3788  
Tango War 0  
Tater Tot Lust 0  
Truck Stop Doctor Love 116.22  
Vagrant Pale Horse 0  
Wombat Vespira 236.776  
Pilots must be logged in to see the briefing.
Taskforce Pilot
Mission Leader Kilo3
Deck Officer couscous
Gate Attendant Pastry Queen
Navigator Pastry Queen
Tailgunner Meownderthal
Emblem Designer Kilo3
Com-Sat 1 Vagrant
Tool Bag Meownderthal
Flat Bag couscous
Medi Bag Snow
Wookiee Bag Meownderthal
Ambassador Tater Tot
Chalk Bag Vagrant
Still Cam couscous
Airlock Vagrant
Life Support 1 Lordmcfuzz
Mission Pinner Tango
Mission Debriefer Wombat
Mission Reporter happenstance
Stellar Cartographer Lordmcfuzz
Cleaner Meownderthal
Life Support Synthesis Kilo3
Wingmate 01 Kilo3
Wingmate 02 Pastry Queen
Wingmate 03 couscous
Wingmate 04 Patent Pending

Mission Parameters

Mission LeaderKilo3
Mission Size 13 pilots
OriginFort Antwerp
DestinationHydro halting structures
Light Years13.000
G-Well Activity0.874
Technical Rating2.356