String Theory

Mission Summary

Wormholes. Dark forces. Fart conduits. Leotard day comes through once again.

Bane rode Yodel so hard he folded the fork in half, earning a medal of Artifact.

Medal of Valour to DreadFlint for hauling Bane Thunderwolf *and* Yodel back to the fort on the back of Water. Thank goodness it was only a few blocks from the fort and not in deep space.

Medal of Patronage to DreadFlint for bringing the slinky tube/wire string/whispering tube.

Excess brought his slackline; we attempted slack with mixed results.

Babymaggots MacGyver, Peanut Butter and the eponymously costumed Taco joined us, plus rapidly-aging maggots Squeegee and Dixit.

Mission objectives: to connect pilots by the red, green and blue forces of three seven-foot jumpropes. To connect every pilot to every other pilot, in flight if possible.

To serve these objectives we performed dexterous handoffs, heartfreezing near misses, brave HARV maneuvers, backhand and offhand handoffs. Pilots mixed it up, broke it down, went over and under and sideways slideways, and some even kept count. There were a few crashes, but only one or two directly attributable to the stringy objectives.

22 pilots strong, we plummeted through the Minuteman wormhole with space speed and hyperspace hyperlights. Tyrian went #2 next to a No Dumping sign. After slacklining at an unknown point in deep Arlington, we dumpster dived the TJ's in that system. Among the take were roses for Tard, French roast coffee, naans, oranges, and heirloom tomatoes. And fig butter. Let's not forget the fig butter.

On the return voyage Dreadflint and Excess, while communing in space with its ends over their respective heads, ruptured the translucent tube, causing its Slinky-like wire framework to start uncoiling. Dreadflint, instantly grasping the situation, took off like a rocket down Mass Ave causing the tube to unravel at ludicrous length.

Retracting this new-made string of astonishing unforeseen length back into the fleet -- I've never felt prouder of SCUL -- as one pilot we took up the coils in flight. With this curly, boinging, iridescent, 400-foot entity spanning the length of the fleet, passed from hand to foot to hand, we covered the last few lightyears to the launchpad. There were synchronized dismounts and remounts of connected HARVs plus many lower ships. And we only had to stop once to untangle Bane Thunderwolf.

Mission status: success. Awesome orbital, guys. Thank you.