Skunk Day dawned at 10:30 pm or so in the parking lot
where all great things begin. Fearless leader pop-quizzed the
gathering on their rank: sly pilots looked up the answer on their
magical internet transponders, competent pilots barked out
NameRank&CerealPreference, and the rest just quacked in confusion.
Mission directive: posi riding funk derby maskitude. Plus, AVOID
BUSTING CLOUDBUSTER’S DISCODEATHSTAR (again).
New ships: DeathTrap’s tall and dreamy Bieber Fever, and the demented
hellspawn of a Stogie/Nosepicker brainstorm – Wadlow, the bike too
tall to live.
Masks are pulled up, tied down, drawn on, or tucked behind the ears;
the music is freed from its digital confines; pilot legs swing to
straddle choppers; SCUL takes off and soars into the night. Ten
minutes later: first stop, first mechanical, first dance of the night.
Aaaand … SCUL takes off again! Weaving through the strange and
beautiful constellations of Union, Porter, Harvard, Central, and
Kendall, SCUL encounters many new and energetic life forms to which it
brings the message of funk. The pilots have only minor bruises and
battle fatigue when they stop for refueling and garbage drops before
heading over the asteroid belt into the dangerous reaches of the
Emitting powerful sonic tractor beams as it wends through the night,
SCUL accumulates klingons at every turn. By the time SCUL reaches its
next disco-boogie debarkment, there are clusters of friendly food who
want more. They are treated to the grand spectacle of a mysterious
knighting ceremony. Tears, blood, and secrets are spilled as Spark
and Sprocket enter the ranks of the chosen many.
It’s late, we’re exhausted, and the Boston System is sound asleep.
What are weary pilots to do? Derby of course! Back into the
Cambridge System SCUL flies and lands in an abandoned transport
docking bay for three furious battles. First Victory goes to Kpafun!
Second Victory goes to Moose! And the Final Victory of the evening –
in a hotly anticipated head-to-head between Nosepicker and the
fearless leader – goes to … Skunk!
Finally, saddle-sore and silly, SCUL sets the engines on warp factor
slow and trundles home in the glow of the disco death star and some
sleepy mood music.
It’s Five A.M. and SCUL is calling this mission “success.”
|Mike 'The Situation' Sorrentino
|Petty Officer First Class
|Abandon All Hope
|Petty Officer Third Class
|Secret Asian SCULly
|Life Support 1
|Life Support 2
|Minister of Zoobs
|Skynet Operator Pre
|A good time for the Admiral